Is Your Marriage Playing Chutes & Ladders?

 

Don: Do you remember playing Chutes and Ladders? It is a world-famous board game. It’s been around since the 1500s. It was initially started in India and called Snakes and Ladders. Then it went to England, and in 1950 came to the United States. It’s been played all over the world for hundreds of years. The concept is pretty simple – roll the dice, if you land on a ladder, you get a boost into the higher levels. If you land on a space with a shoot or a snake, you drop. The goal is to get to the 100th space, which in ancient India meant salvation. When Parker Brothers bought the game, they changed the name from salvation to home. But if you navigate all the shoots and ladders well, you end up at home. Shoots and Ladders, some things help us advance, and some things take us to the bottom. How do we navigate it?

Renee: So one of the questions that we have for you and your marriage relationship is, what builds you up? What space do you land on that helps shoot you up further than you thought? Do you know what those are in your marriage? What helps build up your relationship? And then contrary to that, what dips you down fast? Are you aware of those as well? We want to get to a place where we know one another and trust that God will get us to “home.”

Don: There are crazy parts in marriage where we think, “we’re doing well. We got this. Things seem great. We’re making progress.” Suddenly, we land on a space and get shot right back down and lose a lot of ground. This downward spiral can be disorienting because suddenly, we tumbled down and don’t know how to get back up. It’s very confusing when you get on a shoot and then get bit by a snake. You may not know what’s going on.

Renee: It’s worth paying attention to in your marriage. What builds your relationship up? How do you do that with one another? What drops you into a downward spiral?

Don: The goal is to make it all the way home. It would help if you had the intentionality of moving through, and recognizing specific spaces will have a positive influence. Are you intentional about the things that elevate you? Are you aware of the things that drop you?

If you’re mindlessly playing along and not paying attention, how is that going for you?