I watched One of the Iron Man movies with my daughter last week. She was in her PJ’s, I was in my sweats, and Tony Stark was in his very cool Iron Man suit.
We had a great time lounging on the couch with pillows and snacks watching the good guys battle the bad guys.
One of the very cool features about the armored suit in Iron Man is how quickly it wraps him up and prepares him for battle.
At the very first sign of a threat, Tony Stark is locked, loaded and ready to go. He becomes “Iron Man” in the blink of an eye.
Watching the movie got me thinking about my own “Protective Suit.”
How long does it take me to armor up when I feel threatened, challenged of exposed?
How many different weapons do I power up in my efforts to self protect?
It turns out that I am not that different from Tony Stark, once you get past the Beachside Mansion,
the garage full of super cool cars and the Bio Metric Heart with an LED light display.
When I feel threatened, I get defensive.
Defensiveness in any intimate relationship will always kill genuine connection and healthy communication.
Before we deal with the threat or conflict in front of us, we have to battle the defensiveness that rises up within us.
In marriage relationships we get exposed, challenged and threatened on a regular basis.
In a movie it is cool to armor up, but in a relationship it is better to open up.
So let me ask you. Are you being honest with yourself about what you are really protecting?
Are you taking responsibility for your defensiveness?
Do you make others pay a price for questioning you?
We will end up in the ditch instead of further down the road if we don’t manage this well.
There will be conversations that don’t happen, connections that don’t form and burdens that are not shared.
Let’s lose the suit, shed the armor and drop the weapons in our Life Together.
Good stuff. Thanks for putting your thoughts into words that connect well.